Life of a probono wedding cake baker: 4 Days Left

I decided to bake the carrot cake yesterday. This was probably a very good choice because I think I may have messed it up. The batter is so thick and full of fruit and nuts that it takes SO long to bake and even when it does seem to be done, its not.

I took it out of the oven too early, and while it looked perfect and delicious, when I went to cut the tops off to level the cake out, it was mushy and sticky. So yes. I messed up and think I may have to do this tier over again. But luckily, I have time.

I was thinking about how much I'm stressing out about this, and how much I love that. My life has been so easy, uneventful and stressless lately, that it feels so good to have something that I am responsible for. A task that I am in charge of and 100% accountable for, that I have to plan for, trouble shoot and execute. It's great. And even if it is just for a week, I have a purpose!

It makes me think about how much better it would be to work for yourself instead of somebody else. It also makes me think about getting a job. And how much I need something that I can contribute to! I know that I recently talked about how much I love being unemployed. And I do! But I feel like I need something to dedicate my time to. Just a little something. Because sitting around blogging and riding my bike all day isn't contributing to society. Which makes me feel like some sort of a dead beat. Which isn't anything new.

Life of a probono wedding cake baker: 5 Days left

Hi. It's Monday. Which means I have 4 and a half days before the cake has to be done. And although I did this last year, I think I forgot the actual steps in this process. The most pertinent step is when to start the cake. Should I start baking today? Will the cake taste old by the time the bride and groom cut into it? But if I start baking two days before (like what some cake baker's blog suggest) there won't be any room for error! Some say to freeze the cakes until they're ready to be frosted. But I don't feel good about that either. I know, I'm being overly-paranoid about this cake. And no, the night terror have not subsided, as of yet.

Yesterday I prepped the pans, cut wooden dowels and wrapped cardboard circles with tinfoil (used for support). I have 30 lb of gluten free flour ready to be baked and my kitchen aids (note the plural) are spotless and ready to support a 350 serving cake. The recipes are ready and delicious: Lemon chiffon as the bottom biggest tier (14 in) , vanilla bean with a fresh raspberry center (10 in), and carrot cake with a cream cheese filling (6 in) all with a french butter cream frosting. So, bottom line: I'm ready to bake! But when do I start?

Although I've been working hard on perfecting these recipes, the more blogs I read the more I want to really go all out and make a home make raspberry curd, increase the number of layers and try out new frostings. I recognize that it's not logical to do any of that. I think if I can just start this, I'll stop thinking about changing everything.

I felt that by writing about my cake concerns would help me to sort out any questions and arrive at some conclusions. But it hasn't. Now I just feel more paranoid and nervous and STILL don't know when to start the cakes. Shoot.

Life of a probono wedding cake baker: 8 days and a minor concussion

It sounds like I'm counting down for my wedding. But I'm not. It's for the cake and the small tasks that need to be done before the wedding. Like sewing table runners...

Today's tasks are: 1) buying ingredients 2) wrapping gifts for the bachelorette party and 3) finding a date for the wedding. If you know of anybody OR you want to be my date, send in an application.

I'd like to report that the cake disaster night terrors subsided last night, only to be replaced by dreams of me dying in my sleep. Let me explain:

I'd like to precede this story with this: The trails here are a lot more technical than the ones I've been riding in Missoula.

I went on an awesome group ride yesterday. We were climbing for about 2 hours and my lungs haven't fully acclimated to the altitude so I was pretty tired when we reached the downhill. I couldn't believe the things I was dropping. It was awesome. I felt awesome. Then, out of nowhere, I hit a boulder. Square on. And then flew in to another boulder. Luckily, my helmet protected me from crushing my skull, but while I was lying there after hitting that huge rock the only thing running through my head was "I'm paralyzed, I know it, I'M PARALYZED!" Thankfully my EMT friend was riding behind me and used his skills to ensure me I wasn't paralyzed. Nothing serious, just a minor concussion, deeply cut palm, slightly sprained wrist and blood. I got back on my bike and finished the ride (really slowly). My nurse and EMT friends had a friend stay over last night to wake me up every 2 hours. Just in case I would die in my sleep. So, of course, thats what occupied my dreams last night.

Over all, I feel like a bad ass.

The life of a pro bono wedding cake baker

As some of you may already know, I'm baking my friends gluten free wedding cake next weekend. And while this may seem like quite the daunting task, it's really not. I've done it once before and its surpassingly easy. A lot of work and time in the kitchen, but over all, not very challenging (besides transportation). And since I will be spending hours and hours on end in the muggy floury haze of my small kitchen, I am going to devote the next week's worth of blogs to the production of this cake and the thoughts that arise in the process.

So far the extent of the cake baking has been the constant nightmares in which I either forget to bake the cake or it dramatically falls over in front of the bride and groom. I would actually categorize them as night terrors rather than mares because I wake up in a cold sweat and have the uncontrollable urge to get up and start baking the cake. I imagine that only until the cake is finished and sitting on it's table at the wedding, will these terrors stop. The actual baking will start on Sunday, I expect them to worsen as the week progresses.

I left Missoula last week and I have never missed it more than I do right now. Which isn't normal. I am literally counting down the days until I am back home (11).

The storm that chased our dinner inside. Even when its rainy, Missoula is the most beautiful place in the world!

Improper nutrition and interviews usually results in nausea

Sticky situations. They some how sneak up behind you and beat you down to the ground just like lions on a camera man (reference to a youtube video called "FOOTAGE OF MAN EATEN ALIVE BY LIONS!!!". Look it up, but prepare yourself...It's horrible). Sometimes you're able to sense them, feel them in the air. Like lighting. But unable to discern if the feeling is excitement or terror. Thus, the situation is left to unfold itself. Then, BAM! Your knee deep in stickiness and have no idea how to abate the coming storm.

Example:
1. Frosted mini wheats and two cups of coffee- most likely not good fuel for a long, hot ride.
2. One water bottle in 90 degree heat- questionable dehydration? Not really.
3. Buying tickets to Europe, changing other peoples plans and then getting called for an interview- typical.

Love.

I'm upside down. Everything is silent but for the muted clinking of river stones. I should be thinking about how to get above the water. I need to remember how to move my hips. But all I can think about is this peaceful serenity. Nothing else matters under here, the cool fresh water washes away my guilt, my fear and my thoughts. Clink. Clink. Clink. Russshh. My lungs start to burn. I open my eyes. The fuzzy scene in front of me is unrecognizable and for a moment, the burning stops. Russsshh. All I want is to stay in this moment forever. The burning returns and my head feels light. I flick my hips and move my paddle. Nothing happens. I flick my hips harder and my body remembers what to do next. My arms raise up, paddle brushes across the water, and my body moves to lay flat against the boat. I open my eyes and the bright light burns. The river pushes and tugs me. I'm upside down....

Huckleberry Vs. White Mint Oreo

I usually get huckleberry. Huckleberry ice cream on a warm Missoula evening is, obviously, the best choice. But tonight, I chose white mint oreo. And when the lady asked my what I wanted I verbalized the first thing I saw on the chalk board list of flavors: white mint oreo. As I sat there, on the picnic table bench watching the people line up and the sun go down over Mount Sentinel, I couldn't help but think that this choice was, quite plainly, the worst ice cream choice possible. Yes, I know what you're thinking, oreo mint is usually pretty delicious. Ben and Jerry's Mint Chocolate Cookie is my favorite Ben and Jerry's flavor. But tonight, at the infamous Big Dipper, I wasn't feeling it. And against my true and passionate love for ice cream, I didn't even finish my kids scoop.

Life is full of so many choices, small and big. And that night, my poor decision to get white mint oreo sparked another, much bigger (and hopefully better) decision. That night, against my desire, I feel under societal pressure to be different... and it failed. I though about my other choices and desires in life. My choice to start building my career and my desire to play instead of work. I love being free to do what I want (huckleberry). But I feel the need to succeed in a career (white mint oreo). Well I don't like white mint oreo. And thats it. I don't want to go to work. And thats it. So here is the new game plan: I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing and not feel bad about being unemployed. If something comes up that I'm super excited about it, I will take it. If I'm not 100% passionate about an opportunity presented to me, then it will be turned down. Because really, what's the point in dedicating your time to something that doesn't even rial you up a bit? In the mean time, I'm going to ride my bike and float the river everyday. Because that's what makes me happy and that is what gets me excited. Until I find something that I love more than being free, I'll be playing everyday.

Right now, there something in Spain that seems to be enticing me. So I think I might go check out what exactly that is...

(photo: Western Montana In Business)